Back in December of 2016, gamers got their taste of the latest video game to cinema adaptation. With a star studded cast, Assassin’s Creed gave gamers hope that this could be the first movie to break the curse of the video game movie.

Alas, as the early reviews began to trickle in, it was apparent that Assassin’s Creed was destined to join the ranks of Warcraft, Mortal Kombat, Tomb Raider and other highly anticipated big screen flubs.

Normally we like to give a movie review our full “10 thoughts” treatment. But since Assassin’s Creed is already fairly old (out on video this month), and the fact that there really isn’t that much to say about this dud, we decided to give you guys a mini review instead. It will be short and to the point.

Assassin’s Creed Movie Review

The failure of the Assassin’s Creed movie was a bit a surprise to me. With some serious talent in the movie in the form of Michael Fassbender, Marion Cotillard, Jeremy Irons, and Brendan Gleeson, I had some really high hopes for this movie. Fassbender has been killing it lately with the X-Men movies and Cotillard is an Oscar winner. Even still, I tempered my expectations as it was a video game movie, which have history been bad.

Little did I know that Assassin’s Creed would beat my expectations to a pulp as it provided viewers with a confusing, boring, poorly written film that struggled to find its way.

Fassbender takes the leading role in Assassin’s Creed as Callum Lynch, a death row inmate stolen away after his supposed execution by the Abstergo corp. Why? Because they need his DNA to unlock the location of the Apple of Eden, a plot device last known to be in the possession of his ancient ancestor, Aguilar.

If you’ve played any of the Assassin’s Creed series of games, then you get the gist of the plot. Unfortunately, viewers are beat over the head with explanations of everything happening in the movie, and it feels like Marion Cotillard’s Sofia only exists to explain things to the audience. In fact, none of the characters are actually fleshed out in any real way.

Lynch is clearly there to jump around the Animus and move the story along, Sophia we touched on, and Jeremy Irons, who plays Rikkin, is solely there to be the big bad evil guy for us all to hate. Characters motivations are paper thin and you never really get attached to anyone. It’s apparent to everyone except Lynch himself that he’s being manipulated, yet he seems not to care until the end.

What’s worse is that the script writers seem to have figured out everything gamers loved from the video games: intense action, period pieces, stealth, and some brutal combat and then decided that it all needs to take a back seat to the happenings in the present day. Ironically, that’s pretty much what everyone likes the least about the Assassin’s Creed games.

This movie had so much potential, they could have visited a few of Lynch’s ancestors throughout different time periods, treating viewers to some awe inspiring locations. Instead, we had all of 3 flashbacks of ancient Spain. Much of the present day is spent in the dreary confines of the Abstergo building, which for some inexplicable reason, houses a bunch of assassin “prisoners”.

While the flashbacks were actually high on excitement, the characters there weren’t much better, as Aguilar (also played by Fassbender) barely said 2 words. When Assassin’s Creed was at its best was when Aguilar and the other assassins were parkouring their way around Spain. There were some great cinematography moments here that went a long way to helping this movie keep the viewers interests. Unfortunately those moments were few and far between.

While the movie did have some redeeming moments, anything that might have saved it was ultimately destroyed once Assassin’s Creed hit the 3rd act. The movie then decided to kick into overdrive and fast forward to the end. This act was full of plot holes, I was constantly scratching my head.

But the biggest failure has to be the ending. Blink and you’ll miss it. Turns out the Apple of Eden was hidden in the Templar’s home city all along in Columbus’ grave. All they had to do was ask the priest for it apparently, as he walked it out in a box. They really needed a better inventory system. The movie then shoots to the end with Lynch walking into the templar meeting and killing Rikkin. Fade to black. That’s it. Once the credits started to roll, all I could say was, “That was it?”.

Do yourself a favor. Stick with the video games and give this one a hard pass.